As with everyone, for me the new year is a time of reflection, both looking back on the past and looking towards the future. And what I find each year is that I am always amazed at how God gets me from point A to point B. When looking towards the future I am filled with impatience about where I am going and how I am going to get there, but all the time He knows—and year after year without fail He brings me to where I am supposed to be.
I wonder when a consistently occurring thing like that will start to take hold in my mind and my heart. I know that if that kind of a Faith possessed me it would break down all the barriers of the fears, worries, and anxieties in which I am constantly entangled. If I could just believe that God would get me there. If I could smile at uncertainty in the knowledge that my heavenly Father knows better than I could ever know. If I could rest in the knowledge that each and every day, that each and every year of my life is in His care… how might I be different?
I wrote a sonnet this semester in my creative writing class that depicts the kind of faith that I know I ought to have as one of Abba’s children. It is entitled Sparrow.
Her arms are thrown up high into the air.
Her outstretched palms catch each drop of moisture.
The wind is blowing softly through her hair,
and rustling grass serves as an overture.
She sings her joyous love song to the land,
and to each murmur of the thunderous sky.
A sparrow held in so mighty a hand,
she smiles, a child, and never questions why.
Her feet are twirling in the dirty street;
dancing in puddles festering like a sore.
But she pretends there’s grass beneath her feet,
and gives of love to all who needed more.
Her spirit like a bird inside her chest,
does not feel caged, but in hope finds its rest.
[Matthew 10:29-31 “Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” ]